Started a new blog, din' I!

For reasons best known to myself I have decided to start posting blurbs on albums in my collection HERE.

I'm starting with records, because it's a less daunting task than going through my iTunes, although I might do that someday too…

I'm going to try and post a new one everyday, which means there's a grand total of one album as of now. Woohoo!

There's no particular order or method to the posting and there are some pretty dodgy things going to end up on there, so this should be entertaining. To me, at least.

To anyone else… Who knows?

Where the fuck you from?

This made me laugh and laugh…

Like an oryx in a missile range?

I would never be one to underestimate the stupidity of the armed forces in any part of the world. Their endeavours are nearly always at odds with what I think they should be doing (ie, they kill people and blow stuff up, I think they should use their time and resources more… Constructively).

BUT, I never thought I would see the day when the US armed forces would stock a missile range with African herbivores. It beggars belief, but ACCORDING TO THIS that's exactly what's going on down in Old New Mexico's White Sands Monument...

"Watch out for vehicular collisions with oryx on the highway to and from White Sands, as well as while driving within the Monument. These African antelope, which are slightly smaller than elk, were introduced on neighboring White Sands Missile Range, and have since strayed onto the Monument and the surrounding area."

I mean seriously, are they using them for target practice? They can't get away with using Arabs, so they're torturing deer instead?

In search of more information I visited the White Sands Missile Range Website and found this nugget under the heading 'Think Safety':

"Drivers on and around White Sands Missile Range should be aware of the driving hazard presented by wildlife and, in particular, the African antelope known as the oryx. Oryx are the most prevalent wildlife hazard to motorists traveling through the range and, to a lesser extent, other wildlife such as mule deer and pronghorn, which can occasionally be encountered along the roadways."

This is accompanied by a helpful picture of an oryx, but there is NO REASON GIVEN for WHY they're there in the first place. I supposed the picture is necessary, given the fact that most American visitors to the place would never have seen an oryx because they're indigenous to a continent thousands of miles away! Did they swim?

I am so confused, but the lesson today is — look out for them damn oryx and pronghorn if you're visiting the White Sands Monument.

Seriously though, what sort of monument is that anyway? It's a fucking sandpit!

Ooh, baby!

This is one of the greatest things I've seen in ages: The Overdub Tampering Committee

These guys claim that they've been tampering with downloads of leaked albums for four years, adding a piano line here and an ambient noise there and re-releasing it through the P2P network under the guise of the real album. Brilliant, no?

Check out the comments on both of their blog posts, it's hilarious! Comments range from positive incredulity to serious hostility. These are the people who aren't getting enough (or any?) sex. Perhaps they've broken their wrists, are tapping the keyboard with their noses and have absolutely no means of release!

Some of them, a guy named Doug in particular, are very cross:

"Bullshit. Proof? Give it or shut the hell up. You are a group of liars, who in their right mind would download music, screw it up and pass it around for no reason at all? … Fucking liars. If there was a large group of people doing this, do you think they would have the technical know-how to maybe even get their own website? You are a bunch of faggots trying to scare people away from sharing music, and it's not going to work. Don't buy into this bullshit."

Grr… No sex in Doug's life! And certainly not with any godamned faggots! He followed up his 'Don't buy into this bullshit' with another comment. Something along the lines of 'Let this die' — if he can't even follow his own advice, why should we?

Then there's this:

"Clearly a hoax. Clearly the work of one person. The insistence on writing in first person plural, as if nine people are sitting around the keyboard at once, it's a dead giveaway. Everything is "we," "our," "us." You're trying too hard, dude."

This person has obviously never read the manifesto for a GROUP of people before, where the use of the first person plural is, in fact, the best way to describe what the group does. Sure, you could use the singular, but that doesn't express the plurality (surely key…) and the third person plural is too detached. In fact, when writing about them, the TPP is what I am using, because I'm not one of them. You see?

I'm enjoying this waaaaay too much.

I have to admit, I'm curious about how much truth is involved, but I stopped just short of death threats and comments on people's sexuality. Actually, I stopped at 'Think for a minute', decided it wasn't that important, and went about writing this.

In fact, it'll probably end up in the next What's Goin' On? in some form or other. It's interesting whether you believe it or not. I love to think it is happening, that I have DL'd some of their handiwork and that I'll never really know for sure…

If only some people weren't such Dougs.

AAAAAGH!!

They're coming! They're coming!

Who?

The weasels…

So, what's been going on since my last post? Oh, yeah — my blog, I haveta do the writing. Jaybus.

I discovered Facebook mostly by accident and partially by stalking people I haven't seen in 10 years. It's an odd thingy, and the evidence that it's making me neglect this page is overwhelming. It's not deliberate, but seriously, I am only one man and I can't socially network constantly and in as many places as the internet would like me to at once! No, I cannot!

But I'm trying, gawd, I'm trying.

It's a lovely day here, for a change, so I might head out to the aul' Bos for an aul stroll in the new sun. It's not what I'd call toasty warm, but it's certainly an improvement on fucking cold, if you get my meaning.

Talking of meaning, the Dutch have a saying "If the Dutch lived in Ireland they'd feed the world, if the Irish lived in Holland they'd drown." I love that…

The best thing is that it's so true.

Off I go to drown. Fuck.

Get this

How Europe Underdeveloped Africa is a book written in the 1970s in which author Walter Rodney says it was European fucking about that left Africa utterly bolloxed. Mostly. And people argue that this isn't so…

Er…

Um…

But…

I find colonialism and post-colonialism fascinating. As an Irishman, to some extent at least, I think it's interesting to look at the degree to which my own 'Motherland' was fucked by empire building jizzbags.

I also think it's interesting that Britain is allowed membership of the EU despite its occupation of Northern Ireland, while Turkey is not because of it's occupation of a small part of Cyprus. Does that seem a little like imperial cronyism?

Ah, sure the Brits were always there with the aul Empire, them Turks, though… Unscrupulous bastards!

Now, I'm not saying Turkey has any particular business in Cyprus — although there is an argument that they have a fuck sight more right to be there than the, ahem, British troops there (Londonderry Road really got my goat while I was there). At least from a historical perspective. The bastards took historical artifacts from the north of the island where, er, most of the historical artifacts are of Turkish origin. Hair splitter! That's me…

So, here again we have a situation in which the Brits can do what they like but them there darkies can't.

I smell a double-standard, rampant racism and a continuation of the sort of thinking which led to the fucking of Africa in the first place.

Mind you, it's easy for me to say as a privileged white western male — the world is my lobster in the fullest sense. I often wonder how I managed to draw such a very long straw, but still have the cheek to whinge about my lot.

What a prick I am.

Grr.

This rocks my wurld, sorry.

There's just one simple fact — you are wrong.

Wow, look at the time. Where does the year go?

So far this year I have become a registered Citizen of the Union (Yooropeen Onion), had a go at fashion photography, interviewed Henry Rollins, started and left a soul-crushing job in market research, blurbed some blurb about Radiohead for a new magazine, pestered the editor of Amsterdam Weekly, applied to become all kinds of different people and indulged in various other activities but all the while I have made no money.

Hmmm…

I don't think I've quite figured out this whole work=money=joy thing. Actually, I don't believe that equation is accurate at all. I've discovered that it looks more like Work=misery=money=temporary joy=lack of money=work… and on and on and on and on and on and on until you die.

But the problem is, this whole money thing is a bit confusing to me.

Right, so the notes and coins I have in my pocket have been attributed an arbitrary value, which fluctuates depending on the whims of people I don't know and will never meet. It apparently has value based on reserves of gold, although this is more hearsay than anything and doesn't make much sense anyway. After all, gold is just a metal which has been attributed an arbitrary value, which fluctuates depending on the whims of people I don't know and will never meet.

So, you see, right there is my problem.